An open letter to my 2015

I’m not sure if I was very observant, more mature, or what have you for having this conclusion, but 2015 is probably the year with the most whirlwind. No complaints, though. I felt most alive.

I may have sighed, cursed, wished for you to end, almost gave up on you too many times. But those were mere expressions of exhaustion for trying and giving all I’ve got for you, because at the end of the day, I only wanted to give you my whole.

For my work.

I know I’m not the best out there. There were a few times I even failed on squeezing out all efforts. I may have also lost that spark of passion a couple of times. But know that every time, I was there. I never went on autopilot and I did all I could to make everything work and turn out well. Thank you for testing my patience beyond what I thought was my limit. Thank you for making me push harder and having me pull the will to always, always try again. For finally sorting out things I can change and doing something about it, and not stressing about those I cannot. For always showing me that work can still be fun, despite the challenges.

For my friends.

Thank you, thank you for letting me see the real ones and for giving me the privilege of spending more time with them than I did before. For giving me more on my list of trusted ones, and for the time of forgiving, letting go, and cherishing those who’ve gone to different directions who I may no longer cross paths with. I’ve also gained and built a sturdy support system out of them, and I thank you for the moments you’ve grant us. Thank you for giving me my second family as I’ve spent most of this year working and not being able to get home to my real one.

For my family.

I’ve been out most of the time and they may have forgotten my presence. I know how much it had stress them out, but thank you for making them understand. Or at least making them try, since they had not much choice because they couldn’t stop me from working. But thank you for giving me another year with them, also for letting it grow bigger.

 

For letting me break out from my comfort zone to stand on my own;

to making decisions based on what I know is right even when it means sacrificing a few things or sadly, a few people;

to having heart aches and lost fights as a remedy to my weaknesses;

to the choices I made that I know I’d never regret about;

and for letting me see that I can be more than I ever thought I could be.

 

Thank you for letting me live this year the way I actually wanted to live it.

Thank you, 2015.

 

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